up to something....

So I promise to (hopefully) be back on the blog scene more soon. While I was away, I have been working on something, heres a hint:


(not a great photo, sorry. I don't have a fancy cell phone so this is really the best I can get!)

here, there & everywhere mix

not too much commentary this week. hope you enjoy the mix, it's a shortie but a goodie.


She's Not There- The Zombies
There is a Light That Never Goes Out- The Smiths
Here Comes Your Man- The Pixies
There is no if- The Cure
Art is Everywhere- MGMT



Create a playlist at MixPod.com


For more Mixtape Master madness, peep the playlists on these blogs:

Hi-Fi Weddings | Tylre. | Ten Thou Bride | Fashion Under 100 | Jo, Rooting | One Cat Per Person | another damn life | Savoir Weddings | Fancy Notion | Dead Flowers | Casa De Kaloi | Bunnies’n’Beagles | My San Francisco Budget Wedding | Existing Between Reality and Dreams | Smile in Motion

Be a Mixtape Master. Email Angie or Ashley to get in on it

old friends.

(thats high school me posing in front of Roche Bros, the place all my friends worked, including the one I mention below. Despite repeated applications, I never got the chance to work there. From repeatedly applying, I memorized my social security number, so I guess thanks for that, RBs.)


I went out with a friend last night that I haven't seen in at least 6 years*. She is the dear friend who helped me through my miscarriage a couple weeks ago. It is crazy and so wonderful to literally fall back into a friendship effortlessly like we just saw each other last week. It was so great that it made me sad we had ever fallen out of touch. Everything from watching 'Fallen Attractions' and law and order type shows to how we approached our weddings (she was a big help when I was in the early planning stages since she also felt no need to spend $1000's on unnecessary items and gave me gave tips in general). So here is a quick cheers to the people we don't know our missing from our lives until we find them again. Here here!**





*I gave her the stuffed animals and she loved them! I really love making things for people who really appreciate them!
**no clapping. You know how I feel about clapping.

play my favorite song...or else

Topic 1: Concert Etiquette (or more accurately: 'musical bitching')

So it seems I am very finicky concert person (Ryan kept shaking his head at me and saying 'so many rules!'). If you were to observe me from a distance explaining my thoughts, you would probably see my mouth moving alot and lots of finger pointing/finger waving (you know the whole 'naughty naughty' finger wave). Here are some things I feel should be established concert going rules:

1- stop shouting out shit! (ex. 'TAKE YOUR TOP OFF! WOOOOO!' or 'OH MY GAWD I LOOOOOVE YOOOOOUUUU!" or stupid stuff like 'CATERPILLAR!!!', i.e. some weird inside joke no one else gets but you and your small gaggle of friends. I have no issue when people shout out songs they want to hear (as long as they are by the artist who is playing or a known cover...why do people just shout out songs they like in general?!)

2. keep the stage banter to a minimum! (I have decided I can think of one artist whose stage banter I enjoy. Ben Folds. His stories are great and he is funny. Everyone else, unless your voice is swoon worthy in general, just play your songs please. I do not want to hear 'you're all going to get laid tonight!' First time I heard that at a show, I was at a Blur/Dandy Warhols concert...with my dad. Also, do not ask if I am having a good time. We're all cheering and singing and dancing. Of course we are having a good time. You would most likely know if we weren't and stage banter wouldn't make it better.)

3. stop the jams! (I understand some people like when people rock out and make a 2 minute song 15 minutes long with weird guitar songs. I am not that person. Please say the song so I can sing along! That's my favorite part. I also don't like forgetting what song you are even playing.)

4. and quite possibly my least favorite thing of all time...the encore. (okay, so we paid money to see you, why do you not just play until you run out of time? why do we have to clap for your love and act like you won't come back out when we know you will? my hands hurt. why am I still clapping? Usually when its time for the encore I either do a half-assed clap or cross my arms and glare until the artist comes back on).


whew. thanks for listening to that.

do you guys have any concert pet peeves or a similar long list of rules?


*I named the band after this which consistently cracks me up (the rest of the episode stinks but I love the beginning) but apparently there is a real band too!

like totally mix

Sorry about the lack of posts this week. Still finding out how to get back into the groove of that. I promise I started about 4 different ones that were never put up about everything from concert etiquette to plans for my vegetable garden this year. There's always tomorrow and next week right?

Anyways, thank god its friday. My mix this week was inspired by some close captioning projects at work and having to transcribe lots of 'you know' and 'like'. Here's your mix!

Kiss Me Like You Mean It-The Magnetic Fields
Like It Too Much- Kaiser Chiefs
Nothing Like You- Frightened Rabbit
Bohemian Like You- The Dandy Warhols
I Don't Like Mondays- Bob Geldof
One Day Like This- Elbow
Rock You Like a Hurricane- The Scorpions

Create a playlist at MixPod.com

For more Mixtape Master madness, peep the playlists on these blogs:

Hi-Fi Weddings | Tylre. | Ten Thou Bride | Fashion Under 100 | Jo, Rooting | One Cat Per Person | another damn life | Savoir Weddings | Fancy Notion | Dead Flowers | Casa De Kaloi | Bunnies’n’Beagles | My San Francisco Budget Wedding | Existing Between Reality and Dreams | Smile in Motion

Be a Mixtape Master. Email Angie or Ashley to get in on it

six

(photo by kate rose photography)


happy six months, my love. here's to many many many more happy months.

this is a story but you're not in it.

So last night, even though I had originally felt like staying home and being sad, we went to a concert. I am very glad we did. We saw Josh Ritter and the lead singer for Frightened Rabbit opened. He was really great and now I can't get this out of my head:



and this:



The lead singer looked like my husband's best friend, but hairy. Which made me like him more.That and he had an extremely charming accent. Also, Josh Ritter looked so psyched to be Josh Ritter. It's nice to see a musician so jazzed to be performing and having a blast. In addition to this, there was the most amazing Josh Ritter fan in the audience. He completely made the show for me. I couldn't tell at first if he was serious but as the night progressed it became very evident he was. Here are some highlights:

1- he was headbanging
2- he talked about how great Joh Ritter's hair looked at 4 times.
3- he complimented JR's outfit really loudly and he heard him
4- he knew every word
5- he danced and jumped up and down and fist pumped to all songs

I mean, how great is that? Also, JR was sticking to a very strict valentine theme so he was reading love notes people wrote in to his website. The sweet ones were great (there was a marriage proposal, he said yes) but I loved the silly ones better. Some of my favorites were 'Remember when we made love with Jeopardy on it the background? Remember when I killed the mood by yelling out 'Salmonella!' and 'To Jack from Jack I have been watching you for a long time and now I know you are the best person on earth and I love you'.

Now, off for errands and cupcakes. Happy weekend to you all!

decisions

(it was really tasty. I ate a kiwi with it too)

I've decided a couple things these last couple days (and I am a very indecisive person). I have decided to cry when I'm upset, talk about when I'm upset and allow myself to be upset. I've also decided to celebrate little victories and (try) not dwell (as much) on things I cannot change. for example:

bits of happiness:
1- nail polish
2- hot showers
3- love (for all the amazing people in my life. this includes you, dear reader.)
4- no snow
5- good music

some things I cannot change? cramps. its like my body is nervous I'll forget so it keeps reminding me. all I can do is take a tylenol and breathe. another thing? little bruises. one is where the iv didn't work, others from tons of blood tests. I know these won't last long. another thing? uncertainty. yesterday was another day of people calling. after each call, I asked my husband 'what did they say?' everyone said the same things, sweet and thoughtful things. what did I want to hear? I wanted someone to call and say 'I saw you a year from now, things will get better, I promise'. I know things will get better, I just want a pinky swear that they will, an unbreakable contract stating this. and lastly? jealousy. jealous of people who are talking about fun things, thinking about fun things. I need to stop this. I need to be happy for them. things will get better. they will, that's what I've decided is true. I guess that is just as good as a pinky swear.

loss.

(stuffed animals I made for my friend who is expecting. sewing by hand is so soothing for me. if anyone else wants one, let me know, I would love to make you one. also, just an FYI: I am going to add eyes.)

So as I mentioned last week, I needed some time away to deal with some personal issues. I would first like to thank everyone who reached out and left comments on that post and/or sent me sweet and thoughtful emails*. It meant more to me than you probably realize. I was unsure whether or not I wanted to write about this, but after talking with a fellow blogger** about this, I decided I did want to write. It is not something I should be ashamed of. I think it happens much more often than people talk about***. So, I was pregnant up until about 12:00 today (I had a d&c but my doctor said I was in the process of miscarrying and it would have happened at some point today or tomorrow). I found out at the end of January I was expecting (I had been suspecting for months but lots of negative test results made me think maybe something else was going on). I was elated but hesitant since I knew so much could go wrong so early (I was about 5 weeks when I found out). We told our families (mothers, fathers, stepmoms & dads, sisters, sister-in-laws) and a couple close friends (I told a friend from high school which ended up being the best thing I could have done; she had also miscarried and her experience basically mirrored mine and she has been an amazing resource and shoulder to lean on). I knew I wanted to stay with my current lady doctor since I had been going to her for 10+ years and really liked all the doctors and nurses at her office. Sure I had to wait eons in the waiting room for every appointment but I thought it was worth it for a good doctor. This ended up being a huge issue. Everytime I went I saw a new doctor, they had no idea of my history and basically just 'diagnosed' me with something different every single time. I saw 4 or 5 doctors in the span of week and was told everything from 'you're fine' to 'you're miscarrying' to 'we think it's ectopic' to 'we can't seem to diagnose anyone today! we're having a real off day' and was told I was everything from a couple weeks to 4 months. Also, they never returned my calls (even when it was bad news). They called me one day at work and asked me to leave immediately to get an ultrasound (this was of course the day I got a ride to work) and then after freaking me out, told me nothing (this was also the day I burst out crying at work, then all my co-workers found out what was going on). One doctor said I was ectopic, another said I wasn't, then they 'thought' I was. The best thing that came out of this experience was getting a new wonderful doctor who I have complete confidence in. He doesn't talk to me like I'm stupid, he returns my calls and he 'figured out' what was going on in about 2 days. I am going to keep meeting with him from now on (now my old doctor is calling me back, basically behaving like an ex-boyfriend, they just want to "talk" and they want me back, baby. They didn't really call me baby). The worst thing is probably telling people this baby would not be born, telling our dads and moms they wouldn't be grandparents, our sisters wouldn't be aunts. The worst thing is seeing babies, noticing pregnancies, having all my favorite shows reference babies/pregnancies (Liz Lemon? you too???). The worst thing was having symptoms but knowing there would not be a baby. The worst thing was seeing my husband upset. Also, although this didn't actually happen, all I could think about was someone close to us calling us to say "hooray! we got pregnant and it was so easy and everything is going perfect for us!". Also, now I can't watch '16 and Pregnant' or 'I'm Pregnant and...' or 'I Didn't Know I was Pregnant'. Obviously, this is something I am still going through but I have lots of good people in my life. I've done my fair share of crying and I know some things will still set me off (like the next person who asks 'pregnant yet?'). Right now, I'm just hanging out, watching tv, avoiding returning calls I don't want to, resting and wearing jeggings. This is the one time you cannot judge me for wearing them.

*you know who you are. thanks again.
**again, you know who you are. I cannot thank you enough for talking to me since you had been through this.
*** this being said, anyone who goes through this and needs a friend, please send me an email: orangeimpossible@yahoo.com. being able to talk to people, especially my high school friend, really really helped me out. in good news: she is pregnant again and I could not be happier for her.